又梦到父亲了，可能有时候实在想他吧。他对我微笑。我知道他最爱我了。
有时候我很迷茫，不知道自己当初的决定是否正确。比如，来北京，我做对了么？比如，从事IT，我做对了么？像我这种性格的人，是不是就应该待在乡下小村里？是不是该孤独一生？自己可能大英雄主义了吧，说实话，我真不是英雄，连狗熊都算不上。
不善言辞就不言辞吧，正解也好，误解也好，反正到头都是一样，只是何时结束的问题。也许自己身上的责任都承担实现的差不多的时候，就是该去另外一端了。或许在那个平行世界，父亲在等我。
谁也说不准，也不知道哪一天人突然就走了，你看看这世界每天都有人离开，不都是合理的。父亲就走的很快，很不合理。正所谓我命在天不在我，天想拿你，你有何招？自己决定自己，最简单。只是责任暂时不让你走开。
哎，这世界，太难了。
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